I realized after re-reading my post it may be TMI, but what can I say I am only human doing the best I can... The last couple of months have been really rough on me. I really have felt like I have been on the edge of losing my mind. I guess I don't function well on basically 2+ months of little sleep and feeling sick on top of almost 2+ straight months of pretty sick kids. (Oh yeah Marshall got sick about a week ago. The worst part is we thought he had a contagious virus, which I am pretty sure he didn't have now, and some people say some of the most insensitive things.) I have cried way to much lately. Having sick kids is so isolating. Trying to be nice and keep them away from people we didn't see or talk to hardly anyone (Besides my friend Amy who really helped me through some of my worst days ~ I can't tell you how much that means to me!!). I just felt all alone. Then it is so easy to go down the path, " Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms..." OK so it was much darker than that song but that helps make me smile. I also am really not very good at asking for help. Somewhere in the back of my mind I think that if I appear weak or needy that it opens the door for me to be hurt (yes that goes back to some bad expirences from my younger days). It is just so easy for me to be in control and getting it done, then to be the one that is struggling. I just keep telling myself, "Get it together, suck it up." Somedays it works.
Even on my bad days I keep trying to remind myself of the important things... My kids will get better from the sickness they have. I have a wonderful and healthy little baby growing in my belly. My husband is a supportive though human man who loves me and my kids very much. Things can always be worse so I need to focus on the positives. Life is what we make of it and our trials can make us better people if we allow it too.
Any suggestions on how you got through your tough pregnancy times (or just tough times)?
"Though you may be under a dark tree, always look for the light shining through the branches"
Here are some cute pictures of the kids helping me make candy cane ice cream. It was my way of trying to help bring a little joy.
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6 comments:
Dang. Hmmmm. I didn't realize things were so tough for you guys lately, and I feel bad since I've seen you a few times recently. All I can say is good times are just around the corner. Hopefully you're getting past that nasty 1st trimester. You're kiddies are on the mend. Your sunburn is getting better, and you have a freezer full of awesome food that you had a major contributing factor in. I thought what you and the other gals did was amazing, and I appreciate all of your hard work. Hang in there and give me a ring, we need to get the kids together. Don't forget I just said you're amazing Jen!
That is sad about your friend. They'll get through it though. i'm sorry you are having a rough time. I've been pregnant 4 x and totally understand. Gimme a call, actually I think you did call a while back, I'm so bad at returning messages. Just keep calling me.... We LOVE YA!
Jen I feel your pain!
It's been a rough past few weeks for me (us), and it just gets to hard sometime...at times I wish I had a pregnancy to blame my "over-emotional" self on!
Just remember to smile and be yourself...sometimes I wish we could be back on the cruise so I could get advice from you again :)
I keep trying to figure out how best to reply to this post -- so here is what I came up with.
YAY YOU! I am so glad that you finally have verbalized what you are feeling. When people are strong and carry the world on their shoulders, the rest of us tend to assume that they are good, well, and can handle ANYTHING.
Sometimes, though, even Hercules needs a helping hand . I am glad you have reached out and glad that I am among the many who are there to return the reach.
Love you my friend!
I have to agree that I'm proud of you for reaching out and letting others know you're not Super Woman! I, of all people, know how hard it is to ask for help and let others see a "weakness." Good job! We are still planning on coming down on Friday so I'll call you tomorrow to set something up.
We'll probably stay up all night talking and commiserating. :O) Good times!
Congratulations on the new baby coming.
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